Aku odun, Aku iyedun ooo Emi wa asopo re Lets laugh I overheard a girl talking to her BF, initially I thought she was talking to God, because the things she asked for only God can provide them . 2.When the devil fails to destroy you, it sends you a girlfriend from MBA_ISE . 3.Plz Know your priorities and spend your money wisely. Don"t go and buy selfie stick when your armpit really needs a shaving stick. . 4.Marriage is like jamb You will be admiring UniBen & UNN buh last last end up in OmoPoly . 5.Don"t ever insult or challenge d woman who cook ur food bcos #20 can buy Rat Poison. My hands no dy ooo . 6. For Those Of You Who Went To Private School And Are Intelligent, What Is The Past Tense Of GOtv? . 7.Some have bae but can not cheat .Some can cheat but have no bae . I have bae and i can la la la what do yu want 2 hear? Amebo . 8. Guys plz if u are dating my future WIFE plz take it easy on her, don"t make her shout words like harder, don"t stop, ride on . 9.Condoms are for weak ass men, real men fuck quickly & pull out before HIV notices. . 10.Some chicks be like:"I can"t cook my mom didn"t teach me babe." Now tell me,who taught you doggystyle hehh?? . 11.Why do Ladies with Gap Teeth Always ApoloTeeth Always Apologize Like. "Baby I"m Thorry , It Vont Hapfen Again."? . 12. It"s only African parents dat will advice 12. It"s only African parents dat will advice you for 6hours & still tell you "I don"t have much to say".. . 13.After having sex with many guyz some girls we still call that area private part, for ur information is not private but public. . 14. I am done with breaking people"s heart Am now focusing on the spinal cord . 15. It"s only in Nigeria movies that you will see an angel with a tribal mark . 16.After what Ramos did to salah, I now understand why RAMS are killed during SALAH #UCL fans . 17.True love is when you wear your Girlfriend"s underwear to show Other girls that you are already taken. . 18.Some be dating an ugly girl & be lyk anoda man"s food is anoda man"s poison, my frnd poison na poison ntin lyk anoda man food . 19.She is nt good in bed She is nt good in bed Ma brother hv u try d table, chair or floor, she must b good SOMWIE.. 20. Some Ladies On Facebook They Look Like Beyonce. In Real Life,they Look Like Mugabe. . 21.Ladies Pls Try as Much as Possible to Look Like the Person on ur Profile Pic. This is the 10th Time my Cousin is Waisting Transport . 22.U came to kidnap me with a G-Wagon and u expect me to shout. Abeg shift make I balance well.. 23.Cigarettes and weed are for small boys, real men smoke mosquito coil . 24.If you"re too happy in a relationship, just know you"re the Side Chic. Main Chics don"t usually have peace of mind. . 25.I have never seen someone having heart beat than a guy who impregnate a soldier daughter. He"ll start chewing water, end up drinking rice . 26. Guys, whatever you do in this life, don"t offend your village people My neighbour won 500k from bet9ja and his girlfriend washed it with his trousers. . 27.Child of God and you still have sex with condom Isn"t God"s protection enough for you? . 28.This days, Davido"s girlfriend trend more than some nigerian artist. When last you hear from TerryG? . 29.This is Nigeria where girls borrow make-up and dress just to visit a guy who borrow room from his friend. Too much Confusion and Transmissions . 30.Since i was born and now i am getting old, I"ve never seen the wife of a president pregnant. Brothers and sister have you seen? . 31.Some girls will plait their hair and their forehead will be shining as if their brain is using solar energy. Lemme mind my business sef. . 32.Men are like BLUETOOTH CONNECTION. When you"re beside them, they stay connected. But when you"re away they search for NEW DEVICES. 33.How Chinese people choose their kids name. Very simple! Just throw their pot or pans down the stairs and listen to sound, ""Ding-Ping-Wong-Chun""Ding-Ping-Wong- Chung- Feng"". . 34. Don"t trust a girl who doesn"t use her father"s name on social media. If she can deny her father, my brother who"re you? Share to others and make them laugh .